Showing posts with label procrastination. Show all posts
Showing posts with label procrastination. Show all posts

Monday, September 10, 2012

a new path...


So. Earlier this year I started on a new path...and I've been learning meditation...and about Buddhism. Not that I'm going to *become* Buddhist, organized religion is really not my thing...but I find there are many principles to Buddhist teachings that really resonate with me.

This definition of meditation comes from the website of the center where I've been going for classes: "Meditation is a simple yet profound method to improve the quality of our lives and develop inner peace. Through following very simple, practical instructions we can learn to let go of the causes of our pain and dissatisfaction and to gain the inner peace and clarity we seek."  How can *that* be bad?!? 

I started out taking a half-day meditation "how to" workshop at a center in Manhattan...and immediately felt "yep. this is for me." Everything feels nonjudgmental and gentle. Some of the precepts, while I *get* them, are a little tough to *live.* Which is why I'm continuing to take classes, do workshops, and read anything that seems "meditation for dummies-ish." It's a path I think I would like to follow. Sort of. Ha.

The meditation part has become such a good part of my day. I know I'm not "doing it right" quite yet...getting one's mind to really be still and quiet is *such* a challenge...but just the act of the making the attempt, while sitting with my eyes closed, in stillness, really gives a little respite from the day, and leaves me feeling refreshed and better able to deal with whatever is going on around me. The "meditation" part will get better with time. Now I'm learning how to "set intentions," which I think will actually be easier than trying to just focus on the breath (basic meditation).

Tonight was the first class of a new session. The teacher discussed "our precious human life" and procrastination. All good stuff! I'll share more as I go, but remember, I'm just like a kindergardener at this stage. Still, I'm so pleased to be on the journey.

Friday, May 25, 2012

fear of failure.


I'm often accused of being a procrastinator. Like it's a bad thing! I feel like my "procrastination" stems from a desire for perfectionism. I don't want to start things willy-nilly. I want to plan and prepare, think, think again....think some more...make sure I have the best tools and most well-thought-out idea and I'm doing it at the right time in the best possible forum, BLAH BLAH BLAH. Sometimes The Thing never happens cuz I don't *have* the best tools or the idea hasn't been thought through well enough yet. 

Or, you know, I'm scared. Scared of screwing up, being wrong, looking foolish, failing.

Fear of failure. Powerful stuff. 

Procrastinator sounds better.